Category Archives: Featured
Why ‘good enough’ parenting is good enough during the lockdown
Published: RTE Brainstorm
Author: Dr. Malie Coyne
Opinion: calm acceptance of 'good enough' as opposed to perfection can increase parenting confidence and reduce fears
Have you had enough of articles with suggestions on "how best to parent during the coronavirus crisis"? Me too. Although well intentioned and often providing sound guidance, I feel overwhelmed by the amount of information coming in through my inbox over the past weeks. It's as if I'm drowning in a sea of advice. As if it wasn't enough to be holding onto worries about our families, health, livelihoods and the state of the world, without our usual supports, over-exposure to advice can reduce our confidence and increase our fear.
When dark vulnerabilities collide: What drives teens to kill?
Published: Irish Independent
Author: Malie Coyne
“As the Judge delivered his sentence on the two teenagers convicted of murdering Ana Kriegel, we were left with a deeply uncomfortable question: What drives young teenagers to commit violent crimes like homicide on innocent victims? While teen murder is a rare phenomenon, it can and does happen when dark vulnerabilities collide.
Most of us were deeply disturbed when hearing about the loss of such a vibrant young girl with her whole life ahead of her and how she tragically came to her untimely death.
Seeing photos of Ana smiling tugs at my heart, because as a parent I cannot imagine the earth-shattering sense of loss her family must have felt as this trial was played out in the public domain. Their grief lives on forever.”
Read article
Glossing over anxiety will not make it go away
Published: Irish Independent
Author: Malie Coyne
Worrying and parenting go hand in hand like rhythm and blues. This is especially true during times of transition, such as children’s return to school after the summer, which can reignite a melting pot of anxieties for children and parents alike.
During this time, parents may question their child’s ability to manage issues which may have come up before, with concerns ranging from: “Is my child strong enough? Clever enough? Popular enough? Resilient enough?” Throw a good dab of guilt and self-blame into the mix and you’ll also find parents asking themselves: “Am I a good enough support to them? What if I can’t help them?”
Read article
Are we stressing our children out?
Published: RTE Brainstorm
Author: Dr. Malie Coyne
Opinion: parents mean the best for their children and would never consciously intend to cause them stress, but do they do so inadvertently?
The Stressed documentary followed the trajectory of five adult volunteers who felt overwhelmed by their busy lifestyles and wanted to “be in the moment” more rather “doing” all the time. As therapist to one of the volunteers, I found that using the link between daily living patterns and the three emotional regulation systems (i.e. drive, threat and soothing) from Paul Gilbert’s Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT) was a really powerful way of conceptualising and working with stress.
