Emotional spending during the pandemic

The pandemic is fuelling emotional spending. How do we recognise it and how do we address it. To discuss this Pat was joined on the show by Dr. Malie Coyne, Clinical Psychologist and NUIG Lecturer and author of ‘Love in Love Out’.

 

 

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Grief during Covid-19

I had the pleasure of speaking with Órlaith Sheill, Grief and Fertility Counsellor, in Sydney, Australia about the different types of grief many of us are experiencing as a result of this pandemic. She spoke to me about how hard it is for the Irish community in Australia not to be able to come home to see their families in Ireland, and how the distance feels further away when the freedom you were so used to is taken away from you. We also discuss ways of managing loss and loneliness and how we can find ways to pull through this difficult time together, using compassion for ourselves and towards others.

 

Malie's book 'Love In Love Out - A Compassionate Approach To Parenting Your Anxious Child' is available for our Australian readers on Amazon Australia.

Ready To Be Real – Síle Seoige’s podcast with Malie

I loved chatting to the gorgeous Síle Seoige for her "Ready to be Real" podcast ~ I met her at Soul Space this time last year and we instantly hit it off. In the uncertain times we live in, our conversation focused on the 3 elements of self-compassion, including acceptance and non-judgement of our difficult feelings, our common humanity in not being alone, and self-kindness, which has the power to soothe anxiety and calm our senses.

 

Two part podcast;

Part 1: https://open.spotify.com/episode/44p6PikZ4msvXeIDDE9R4T

Part 2: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6HxvwSTJlLw6eIL01b0VYu

How can I ease my child’s incessant anxiety about coronavirus?

Published: Irish Examiner
Author: Dr. Malie Coyne

Since the coronavirus pandemic started, my eight-year-old daughter has been very anxious about catching the virus and is nervous about people coming near her or touching anything at all outside. 

How can I stop her being so anxious, as it’s really having a negative effect on her life?

Clinical psychologist Dr Malie Coyne, a lecturer at the National University of Ireland Galway and author of Love In Love Out – A Compassionate Approach to Parenting Your Anxious Child , says: “This health crisis has been challenging for many, especially those prone to anxiety.

“My experience as an anxious child, as a parent and as a clinical psychologist, has taught me that parents play a crucial role in containing their child’s anxiety, and in finding the tricky balance between helping them to feel safe and empowering them to test their fears.”

How to show compassion and support for an anxious child

Published: The Irish Times
Author: Sheila Wayman
Interviewee: Dr. Malie Coyne

“Anxiety is both professional and personal for Dr Malie Coyne, a clinical psychologist and self-confessed “little worrier” as a child.

From around the age of eight, she knew there were tensions within the family unit that trailed around the world after her father, a Dutch diplomat, and later ambassador, married to an Irish woman.

“It was just the five of us travelling to all these countries, because you don’t have your cousins, aunties and uncles, and then you are getting to know people all over again.”

She reckons she attended at least nine schools, having started in French education, moving on to the British system and then finishing off her second-level education by doing the International Baccalaureate in South Korea. But it was while she was still of primary-school age that she became aware “all was not okay” at home.”

Dr Malie Coyne’s new book draws on her experiences as a childhood worrier

Published: Irish Independent
Author: Liadan Hynes
Interviewee: Dr. Malie Coyne

“Two minutes into speaking to clinical psychologist Dr Malie Coyne, I’m asking her for advice about my own child. I recount how my six-year-old daughter said to me out of the blue recently, “Mommy, I know the virus kills people,” and describe my panicked attempt to come up with a reassuring answer. “I know it does,” my daughter had replied with a stern look, adding: “You’re going to lie to me.”

Malie’s new book, Love in, Love Out: A Compassionate Approach to Parenting Your Anxious Child, is perfectly timed, given the norms we now live in. In the past few months can anyone claim not to have undergone, at some point, heightened levels of anxiety? Malie’s approach is about supporting your child, while also managing your own emotions.

“I’ve poured everything I have in terms of my own experiences of being an anxious child into it, so it was really emotionally driven. And then working with people every day, and being a parent myself… all of those voices are in there,” she reflects.”

Why ‘good enough’ parenting is good enough during the lockdown

Published: RTE Brainstorm
Author: Dr. Malie Coyne

Opinion: calm acceptance of 'good enough' as opposed to perfection can increase parenting confidence and reduce fears

Have you had enough of articles with suggestions on "how best to parent during the coronavirus crisis"? Me too. Although well intentioned and often providing sound guidance, I feel overwhelmed by the amount of information coming in through my inbox over the past weeks. It's as if I'm drowning in a sea of advice. As if it wasn't enough to be holding onto worries about our families, health, livelihoods and the state of the world, without our usual supports, over-exposure to advice can reduce our confidence and increase our fear.

Heroes Aid podcasts

I was absolutely honoured to record three short videos for the amazing Heroes Aid charity with Dr. Finian Fallon, Psychologist / Psychotherapist, for FRONTLINE working parents. What a worthy cause. Heroes Aid are providing psychological and practical resources including PPE and longer term support to our healthcare staff. Donations to Heroes-Aid.com

Video 1 : Frontline and Childcare: Attachment and Separation

How frontline workers can nurture the all important attachment bond and manage separations with your children during the COVID-19 crisis. Suitable for ALL parents.

Video 2: Frontline and Childcare: Parenting Under Stress During COVID-19

How frontline workers can find a balance between work and parenting. What do your children need and how to embrace being the "good enough parent" you already are.

Video 3: Frontline and Childcare: Burnout / Compassion Fatigue and Parenting

How frontline workers can recognise compassion fatigue and when to seek help? Balancing your Threat response with nurturing your Soothing response, and practical tips for self-care.

Magic Minds Podcast

One of the most authentic podcast interviews I've ever done with the amazing Matt Burke where I share how to compassionately parent ourselves and our children during COVID-19 and tough times generally. We really connected and shared some pretty deep stuff, from why I became a Psychologist, to the importance of attachment, to healing trauma, to managing children's big feelings, to my inspirational mentors, to my love of angel cards and to our deep passion for sharing knowledge and helping others.

 

Watch podcast

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Book & Journal Publications by Dr. Malie Coyne

LOVE IN, LOVE OUT : A compassionate approach to parenting your anxious child

Written by Dr. Malie Coyne.
A guide that empowers parents to understand and recognise anxiety in their children, and to help them to develop strategies to manage it together.
Published by HarperCollins Ireland 2020.

Owning it: Your Bullsh*t-Free Guide to Living with Anxiety

Written by Caroline Foran, with expert contributions and practical exercises by Dr. Malie Coyne.
A frank and funny approach to the ins and outs of anxiety - what it is, why it happens, and how to manage it.
Published by Hachette Books Ireland 2017.

The Little Book of Sound

Written by Nial 'Bressie' Breslin, Dr. Malie Coyne, Susan Quirke.
A pocket guide on how to use 'being sound' to help our minds and our society, and the science that supports why it's so important.
Self-published by 'A Lust for Life' charity in 2017.

Homicide bereavement in Ireland

Cooper, J. & Lagendijk Coyne, M. (2011).
Homicide bereavement in Ireland: A retrospective analysis of homicide bereavement narratives. The Irish Psychologist, 38(4).

Onset of remission and relapse in depression

O’Leary, D., Hickey, T., Lagendijk Coyne, M., & Webb, M. (2010).
Onset of remission and relapse in depression: Testing operational criteria through course description in a second Dublin cohort of first-admission participants. Journal of Affective Disorders, 125(1-3): 221-6.

AD/HD in the classroom

Wilkinson, W. & Lagendijk Coyne, M. (2007)
AD/HD in the classroom: Symptoms and treatment. In M. Bellgrove, M. Fitzgerald and M.Gill (Eds.), A handbook of AD/HD (Chapter 18). London: Wiley.

Social Fabric Podcast

What an experience to bare my soul on this podcast, from my childhood experience of anxiety, to what drew me to Psychology, to my parenting f*ck ups and repairs, to my upcoming book, to my deeply confused feelings about Michael Jackson after my amazing day spent in Neverland. I am all about being REAL in my work and in my life as I believe this is what connects us all.

Galway Volunteer Podcast

"Making a commitment to getting to know yourself within as a parent is one of the best gifts you can give your child. It literally changes the background music which plays when you respond to your child's need".

For more on this and my passion for infant mental health, Galway Parent Network, compassion-focused therapy, and my upcoming anxiety book, listen into my contribution to the Volunteer Galway podcast with the amazing Ruth Fagan.

Click to play podcast

Dublin City FM – Listen to my ‘Mental Heath Laid Bare’ Shows

Listen back to a collection of "Mental Health Laid Bare" podcasts, which were originally broadcast on Dublin City FM. On them I offer guests a chance to openly discuss their personal struggles with mental health and share their tools for wellbeing. I also interview professionals in the field, and those with a particular vantage point.

You can listen back to all the podcasts here; mentalhealthlaidbare.com/backstory

Click below to listen to a compilation of extracts from my shows

A Lust for Life win Social Entrepreneurs Ireland Impact award 2016

A Lust for Life won the hugely coveted Social Entrepreneurs Ireland Impact award on 12th October 2016. I was honoured when they chose me as their First Follower for "guiding them through some critical junctures when they really needed support in the early days".

Here is a testimonial written by A Lust for Life Co-Founders Niall Breslin (Bressie) & Susan Quirke on my close involvement with them since October 2015:

"Dr. Malie Coyne, Clinical Psychologist based in Galway was A Lust for Life's first follower. Although Malie followed our vision, passion and drive to create real change, we followed her profound capacity to humanise and communicate psychology in a way that is highly professional and yet penetrates the heart, which she always does with such grace. Malie also shares our passion for a new Ireland, an Ireland that puts the wellbeing of its people first. She has guided us through some tough periods at critical junctures when we were met with waves of darkness, struggle and pain from people contacting us looking for help, and she helped us embrace the light together. Activism and social entrepreneurship can sometimes be an incredibly lonely and frightening place, words that often reverberate on those evenings when you feel suffocated by your own fears, concerns, thoughts, and demons while recognising the needs and struggles of others. Malie has made this a far less lonely road for us all at A Lust for Life at times when we needed to hear it and allowed us recognise the impact of our work which we sometimes lose sight of".

For more information on Bressie's reaction to winning the award see the following article: http://www.alustforlife.com/mental-health/well-being/a-year-in-the-life

Here also is a video clip of Bressie's acceptance speech on the night: https://youtu.be/0KwSyrAlrzM