Category Archives: Lifestyle
Share a #smileypancake with a ‘warm someone’ who brightens your day
Published: mentalhealthireland.ie
Author: Dr. Malie Coyne
Mother Teresa wisely said; “We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do”
Thinking of Mother Teresa and all the love and compassion she shared with the most vulnerable gives me a really warm feeling and brings a smile to my face. She was an amazing human being with such a presence about her. When she smiled she ignited a true sense of self-worth and dignity in those who may have felt they had little to smile about.
The tyranny of tradition: How to survive Christmas
Published: Irish Independent
Author: Emily Hourican
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“When it comes to preparing ourselves for the expectation versus the reality of Christmas, I really like the formula: ‘Happiness = Expectations minus Reality.’ Because we live in a world that drives our expectations up, we’ve ended up with a situation where our expectations are beyond reality’s capacity to meet them, so the gap between expectation and reality can be massive. The fact is that families spend more time together at Christmas, which can inevitably lead to tension and confrontation.
“This is natural and this is OK. We all experience conflict, nobody is immune. Expecting perfect families sets us up badly. Rather than see it as an ‘if’, try to see it as a ‘when’, so ‘when there is conflict, I will take a breather, I will try not to do harm, I will take responsibility for my part and I will try to repair.’ Confrontations are painful, but they happen to all of us and are what make us human. It is important for parents to make their best efforts to repair in a way that strengthens their relationships with their children, which is a precious opportunity to model how healthy relationships work.”
Strong, on-song and woke but why do Anna and Elsa have to be so skinny?
Published: Irish Independent
Author: Yvonne Hogan
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“As a mum of two young girls who binged on Frozen, we are eagerly awaiting its sequel. Whilst there has been much discussion about the behavioural characteristics of both Anna and Elsa, who each display strong personalities in their own right, it is a shame that once again we have stick thin figures with unrealistic features, which are not representative of the norm.”
“Anything that children are exposed to at a young age can have an influence on their perception of the world, on their emotional and social development, and on what they perceive as a “desirable” way to look, especially young girls. However, it’s all about the balance between those influences and the influences from their parents. The most importance influencer during childhood is the child’s relationship with their parent. As long as the parent is explaining to their child that the characters they see on screen are not realistic images (nor are they attainable just as Elsa’s magic isn’t!) then this can lessen the impact on their young impressionable brains and allow us all to enjoy the film for what it is.”
Do you suffer from ‘female fury’? Here’s how to make it work for you
Published: Irish Independent
Author: Julia Molony
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“being assertive is vital to your emotional well-being,” Coyne stresses. People who lack assertiveness can find themselves holding in anger which ends up coming out in burst of anger that are inappropriate towards other situations,” she says. “Anger comes from an unmet need. So if you are not able to express your need, it will impact you in a really significant way. Apart from anxiety and depression and stress and all the physical stuff, I think your sense of self is hugely impacted. Because you are walking around the world not getting your needs met.”
There is a cultural aspect to this too, and assertiveness, Coyne believes, is a skill that a lot of Irish people need to learn. “I think assertiveness is something that people really struggle with. I’m half-Dutch and in Holland I find that there’s less of this people-pleasing, ‘I’m grand, I’m grand’… there, if you’re pissed off, you’re pissed off and that’s OK. In Ireland, you just say you are fine.”
Life hacks to help stay positive
Published: Irish Examiner
Author: Geraldine Walsh
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“’Negativity bias’ refers to the way in which negative experiences weigh more heavily on the brain than others. We’ve evolved to be fearful and heavily attuned to the strong possibility of a threat, in order to sustain our survival, whilst underestimating our resources to manage.
Left unchecked, the negativity bias can become a serious impediment to good mental health, as it has been found to be synonymous with anxiety and depression. Studies in psychology and neuroscience have shown that for every upsetting thing that happens, we need five positives to balance it. Knowing that not all emotions are equal gives us a sense of control over what we can do to counterbalance negativity, and this is where making a conscious effort to be compassionate towards ourselves and others comes into play.”
Read article
How to politely leave a WhatsApp group, and other social media conundrums
Published: The Irish Times
Author: Fiona Hyde
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“For professional or personal reasons, many of us can’t just simply opt out of using social media altogether, but for mental resilience”
“An easy way to cut down on our social media use, and our anxiety around it, is to remove ourselves from certain group chats, and limit or block our interaction with particular people. But doing so requires a certain etiquette to avoid causing offence, or coming across as plain rude.”
Read article
The dark side of our cleaning obsession
Published: Irish Independent
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“Many people find that cleaning can be quite a therapeutic activity, as can ordering our environments for our well-being. As long as cleaning does not begin to interfere in a significant way with your personal, social or work life, then each to their own.”
“Excessive cleaning is one of five subtypes for OCD and is also known as contamination obsession with washing/cleaning compulsion.”
Read article
Sleeping with the enemy: What is coercive control?
Published: Irish Independent
Author: Áilín Quinlan
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“Because coercive control doesn’t relate to a single incident, but is rather a purposeful and sustained pattern of controlling behaviour where one person seeks to exert power, control or coercion over another in a relationship day in day out, the damage can often be deep and cumulative.”
“From an attack on a partner’s liberty and human rights, to isolating them from sources of crucial social support, to exploitation of their financial and emotional resources, to depriving them of the means needed for independence and overall well-being – the impact is far-reaching.”
Read article
Why I dumped my toxic friends (and keep my real ones closer)
Published: The Irish Times
Author: Geraldine Walsh
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“Being with warm people is the ultimate mood-changer and the answer is found in your brain. A meeting of the minds, or a good laugh with the right person, can activate optimal levels of your ‘feel-good’ brain chemicals and drastically lower your stress levels, by relaxing your heart rate and blood pressure. The endorphins can act as a natural pain reliever, whilst the serotonin release can serve as an antidepressant or mood lifter without the side effects.”
Read article
Ageing with confidence
Published: Irish Independent
Author: Caroline Foran
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“Getting older is a time of great change with both losses and gains. Facing menopause and the end of your fertility as you know it is not an easy prospect, not to mention the really tough physical symptoms which accompany it. This could be particularly difficult for women who may have dreamed of having a child, but didn’t or couldn’t, or those wanting more children. For women who have had children, the physical changes to their bodies can really impact on self-confidence.”
Read article
The rise of steroid use: Irish men are feeling pressure to get a ripped Love Island body
Published: Irish Independent
Author: Áilín Quinlan
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
News that a physically fit, sporty adolescent, had died from severe brain-swelling, triggered by a muscle-building steroid, sent shock waves across the country.
Earlier this month, the Coroner for the case said he was satisfied that that the cause of the death of 17-year-old Luke O’Brien-May from Kilmallock, Co Limerick, was linked to the ingestion of the steroid, Stanozolol.
Read article
Are online ‘friendships’ with strangers taking over for stressed-out parents?
Published: Irish Independent
Author: Jen Hogan
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
Since becoming a mother, I’ve often found myself reminiscing about how different things were when I was growing up. And though the perspective of a child is very different to that of an adult, memories of one parent taking turns to walk all the children who lived on the road to school, and waking up to find a neighbour’s child in my bed because her mother had gone into labour overnight, are to the fore of my mind.
Read article
Volunteer for a better LIFE
Published: Irish Independent
Author: Áilín Quinlan
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
Getting involved in his community brought Mark Gaffney friends, helped his family settle into a new country, supported him through a period of unemployment – and even helped him find a new career.
The challenge of relocating his family from London to the West Cork town of Bantry 16 years ago was a major one so, in a bid to settle in, Mark embarked on a cycle of community activism and volunteer work.
“The only way I could get to know people was to volunteer, because I didn’t drink!” he quips.
Read article
Burnout is nothing to be ashamed of: Mental health in the workplace
Published: alustforlife.com
Author: Dr. Malie Coyne
Author: Dr. Malie Coyne
.
To mark the importance of ‘Mental Health in the Workplace’, which is the theme of World Mental Health Day 2017, here is my podcast with the amazing Ciara Plunkett on KFM’s Kildare Focus show in August 2017. In it, I speak about how we need to change the conversation about mental health in the workplace, in terms of employers prioritizing proactive strategies to promote positive mental health and wellbeing, which will enable employees to feel more valued, reduce absenteeism and increase productivity in the long-term.
Are holidays becoming a time to show off rather than switch off?
Published: The Irish Times
Author: Leonie Corcoran
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“Are you more interested in showing off or switching off on holidays? In a recent travel trends survey, almost half of the respondents (47 per cent) said social media is driving up the need to experience “more” on holidays, with almost a third (30 per cent) booking trips based on whether they think the destination or activity will impress on social media. The survey, carried out by online travel company Travelzoo, also found that travellers are conflicted about whether to show off or switch off while on holidays, with many desiring to be disconnected from the digital world.”
Read article
Me and my mentor: Celebs on the importance of role models
Published: Irish Examiner
Author: Áilín Quinlan
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“PJ GALLAGHER is a household name: His TV performances have made him one of Ireland’s best-known comedians and he’s been described by Ryan Tubridy as “an inspiration”.
Yet, says Gallagher, had it not been for the influence of his role model, mentor, and fellow comedian Jason Byrne, he’d probably never have stepped inside the doors of a comedy club.
Role models are an important source of inspiration and guidance for children and young people.”
Read article
Think twice before having a one-night stand with a stranger
Published: Irish Examiner
Author: Áilín Quinlan
Expert Opinion: Dr. Malie Coyne
“WHEN it broadcasts next week, the new series about the disastrous consequences for a young teacher of a one-night stand with a sexy but dangerous stranger is expected to attract large audiences.
Paula, which is Olivier and Tony-award winning Conor McPherson’s first original television series, focuses on how one instant spark of attraction can take a terrifying toll.”